


It's Okay to Cry, You Know

by Penthesilea1623



Series: Battle Maiden [6]
Category: Dragon Age, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: F/M, Fluff, and Alistair can't help teasing just a bit, post crying-binge embarrassment
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-04
Updated: 2018-12-04
Packaged: 2019-09-07 07:31:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16849783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Penthesilea1623/pseuds/Penthesilea1623
Summary: After finally breaking down and telling Alistair about what happened to her family, Nell's been avoiding Alistair.Alistair decides to fix that.





	It's Okay to Cry, You Know

She was definitely avoiding him, Alistair thought as he watched Nell make the rounds of the camp. She had been since that night she’d crawled into his tent and finally told him what had happened to her family. That night she’d finally let herself cry it all out, and then had slept curled up around him all night long. He’d lain there, just holding her for ages after she’d fallen asleep, finally falling asleep himself.

When he’d woken up she’d been gone, and since then she’d definitely been avoiding him.

At first he thought he was just being paranoid or overly sensitive. 

But it had been almost a week now. Almost a week of her barely meeting his eye when she spoke to him. Almost a week of her making the rounds when they made camp, and mysteriously coming up with some urgent task just when she got to him. Almost of week of sitting by the campfire when he was on watch wondering when she was going to come out and keep him company or just curl up beside him and sleep.

He missed that. He was tired of her avoiding him. 

She took first watch, and the others drifted off to their tents. Alistair got up as well, but instead of going to his tent sat down beside her. 

Nell gave him a wary look. “I want to get an early start tomorrow, Alistair. You should get some rest while you can.” She told him, all business.

“It’s okay to cry, you know." He told her.

She opened her mouth as if to speak and then shut it and turned back to the fire with a small scowl.

"I do it myself from time to time. In fact I’ve even been accused of doing it more than is strictly manly, although that was Morrigan so it’s possible she was just being, you know, a bitch about it.”

“Maker’s breath Alistair, I know it’s okay to cry." She muttered.

She still wasn’t looking at him. 

"Oh. My mistake then. I thought that since you’d barely spoken to me since that night you might have been embarrassed. You know. By the crying." 

She didn’t reply. 

"The weeping." 

The color in her cheeks seemed to deepen. 

"The fact you blew your nose on my shirt." 

Her eyes shot up to look at him. “You’re the one who held it up to my face when I needed a handkerchief!” 

To her surprise he was grinning. at her. “So I did. My mistake then.” 

She looked away in confusion. “Dear Maker, you are the strangest man.” 

"It’s all right, you can call me Alistair when we’re alone.”

She looked at him, stunned that someone who was Chantry raised, who had trained to be a Templar would make the joke. 

And then she couldn’t help laughing. 

Alistair just grinned back at her.

“Fergus made that exact same joke when he was about sixteen. I thought Mother Mallol’s head was going to explode. She was our Chaplain." She explained. "She thought Fergus lacked the proper respect for the Chantry. She thought we both did, actually." She gave a small laugh. "Who am I kidding? She thought I was running wild. She used to lecture my parents about it constantly." She looked into the flames. "I never thought I’d miss her." 

"She was killed as well?" He asked softly. 

"Yes." She didn’t say anything for a moment. "I’m sorry about the way I’ve been treating you the last few days. I was embarrassed that you saw me like that.”

“What, all snotty and red and puffy? Yeah. That was pretty bad. It might take me a while to get over that." She punched him lightly in the arm. "Ow. Careful. I bruise easily.”

“I was embarrassed you saw me all … I don’t know. Girly." When he didn’t answer she glanced over at him. 

He had a small frown on his face. “You know that I do know you are actually a girl, right? I figured that out a while ago.” 

Again Nell found herself hiding a smile. “You know what I mean. I’m supposed to be tough. I’m supposed to be leading us.” 

"So what, you think I won’t follow you because of one crying jag?”

“It sounds silly when you put it like that." She admitted.

"Probably because it is. Silly I mean.”

“Yes." She agreed. And then to his surprise she scooted closer to him and rested her head on his shoulder. "I am sorry about the other night. Running away like that. And not talking to you." She reached out and took his hand twining their fingers together. "I missed you. I missed our talks.”

He looked down at their joined hands, wondering if it were finally the right moment. He reached into his pocket and took out a carefully folded handkerchief. “Here.” He said, unwrapping it. “Look at this. Do you know what this is?”

She looked at it with a small frown and then looked up at him curiously. “That’s a rose.”

He smiled in relief. He’d been afraid she would make some joke about it. Maybe he actually could do this without embarrassing himself too badly. “Yes. I picked it in Lothering….”

**Author's Note:**

> I've got some inspiration photos and such relating to Battle Maiden on my tumblr. You can link directly to them here:  
> [Battle Maiden photo/style references](http://penthesilea1623.tumblr.com/search/battle+maiden)


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